December 31, 2010

PEACE + LOVE


"There is a prayer that lives in the center of your heart. If you pray it, it will change your life. How does it begin?"


-Matthew Anderson


We wish for you to find your true place and live your heart's desire...

May your 2011 be filled with:
PEACE + LOVE+HEALTH+PROSPERITY

December 27, 2010

TUNNEL TUESDAY


TUNNEL TUESDAY: TAKE A LOOK AT THEESE ONE!!!
Well hello there felines! So I goes to my "tunnel" and I has a big surprise! The 2011 Calendar of The Cat Blogosphere is waiting there for me. Can you believes it felines! Me tunnel comes through for me again. I didn't even has to waits for Canada Post...Theese is simply marvelous! So I takes a look inside and finds Secretary Neytiri & "Ducky" in the month of May. Now theese is a good month for Neytiri because theese is when my Human saw her for the very first time when she was a tiny baby. So I flips on through and lo' and behold, I sees my alter ego "Cowboy Cloon" in the month of October. And I dedicates my photo in that month to "Girlfriend" (our special girl who went to kitty heaven in October 2009). For all you felines who worked on theese calendar, you did spectacular work! Neytiri checked out the calendar giving it her official stamp of approval and teef marks on the corner. And then I gets up close and personal with the Paw-Purr-Azzi and say:
WELL IT SAYS "PAWS" DOESN'T IT?

Join me each TUESDAY felines for other magical and mysterious appearances in my "tunnel".

Mancat Monday - In Memory Of TIM - The Coon That Was "Main"

** We are running our post from last year in honour of TIM, a special friend to us, who passed into kitty heaven a few months back...
T.I.M.'S TOP TIPS FOR "TURKEY TUMMY"
Cloon: Hello Audience, joining us via webcam is "Sri Guru T.I.M.". Welcome Holy One! Long time no see. Have you been on a mountain top somewhere?
T.I.M:
Cloon: "Sri Guru T.I.M." has mouthed a "silent meow".
The Audience is abuzz with astonishment. Cloon pounds his little paw for "order in the court".
Cloon: Thanks for coming forth today with some very important and timely information for the public. Now, before we get into that, did you hit the stores for any Boxing Day specials?
T.I.M: I did indeed. I lined up at sunrise at my favorite pet store for some excellent deals on Num-Nums.
Cloon: Well done! Now on with the subject matter at hand. What exactly is "turkey tummy"?
T.I.M: "Turkey tummy" is when you eats too much turkey and your tummy feels real full.
Cloon: Yes, theese is certainly a common problem at this time of the year. What can be done about this condition?
T.I.M: That's where my top tips for "turkey tummy" come into play.
Cloon: Excellent, excellent. Share with us more, will ya?
T.I.M: Well basically, it's very simple. You stretch out somewhere (see above photo) and don't move.
Cloon: What excellent advice! "Sri Guru T.I.M." is a very wise one! Any other bones you can throw us?
T.I.M: Now listen very closely Audience, this is the most important part. Once you are in "position", you must use your third eye to send some healing energy to your tummy to helps the digestion process. Are you with me so far?
(The Audience is oohing and ahhing...)
Cloon: Silence! Can you be more specific about theese exact process?
T.I.M: I'm afraid not. It's a trade secret and I'm not able to divulge the specifics. However, for "today only" the public may call in to
1-800-TIM-GURU and receive the Boxing Day Special of 50% off my regular "Third Eye" energy healing rates. I also accept payment in Num-Nums.
Cloon: You heard the man! Thank you to Esteemed Feline "Sri Guru T.I.M." for sharing this most timely information with us.
The lines are now open...

December 25, 2010

Update: Clooney Claus Back On Track - Picked Up By NORAD


MERRY CHRISTMAS! AN UPDATE FROM CLOONEY CLAUS

Hello there felines! Whew! Theese one was a close one...I was stranded on the North Pole in the wee hours of the morn...but luckily one of the felines in theese Cat Blogosphere saved the day (the Christmas Day...that is) by leaving us a comment regarding a GPS. Then I remembered a had theese GPS with me, so I was able to finds my way back to deliver the pressies. So a big thank you to Cody from Cat Chat...Cody, I hopes you received my delivery of extra Num-Nums! So me reindeers tooks me to the United States of America where I headed to Californie to the house of Pip, Smidgen, Minnie, Hollie...and Wriggley. Theese ones has been taking the message of Dear Ol' Clooney Claus to heart and has been preparing for my arrival by having some Num-Nums out and waiting for me...to replenish me energy for my busy night. I thinks theese ones over there eat the same Num-Nums I do...the Wellness Num-Nums, so my gift to them from Clooney Claus was a certificate for unlimited Num-Nums (aka stinky goodness) for the year (I hopes their Human will be ok with that because she does a very good job of keeping theese ones in shape...). And for the canine of theese household...Wriggley, Clooney Claus left a "squirrel" squeaky toy. I'z figured that "squirrels" are usually crowd-pleasers for all canines and I couldn't go wrong with making theese choice. Clooney Claus continued on to see our fine "Empress" Miss Kitty, leaving for her an assortment of treats and Num-Nums and a gift certificate for a spa day where she will be pampered and have a toesies and tummy massage. From there it was on to the east cost where Clooney Claus visited Wally, Ernie, and Zoey, delivering Wally's Christmas list(x3) of nip toys, jingly balls, a heated cat bed, a super duper cat tree, and a Flingamastring. They also were given Num-Nums and a "pet psychology" session for Wally to work out his feelings towards Zoey. Then on to see Gracie, where she was given Num-Nums and treats and (for all her hard work in the cat blogosphere) a one week trip to an all-inclusive resort in Mexico to relax and sun herself, have fancy umbrella drinks and dine at the all you can eat seafood buffet. For my "evil twins", Goro and Niko, I left them Num-Nums and their favorite freeze-dried chicken treats, a "cotton candy" for each of them (aka cotton swab/Q-tip), the book "Photography For Dummies" for Niko and a personal mini-bar for Goro. Then on to see Daisy and Harley where they received Num-Nums and treats and their own private pet lizards complete with aquarium. Then backs to Canada where Clooney Claus visited Annie, Derry and Nicki, leaving them with Num-Nums (aka stinky goodness), tickets to go see a Canadian Wrestling match for Nicki and Derry and for the lady Annie a pile of trashy novels (oops I mean...good literature) to get through theese long, cold Canadian winters...and dark chocolate for their Mom. Then back to Western Canada for one of my favorite canines, my friend & associate Mr. L (aka Private Eye Von Ice), I left him the book "Everything You Want To Know About Squirrels But Were Afraid To Ask", a delectable ham bone, and a ticket & backstage pass to the 2011 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show (Mr. L remember to breathe into the paper bag to avoid hyperventilation). For the feline at Von Ice Enterprises, Miss Stormy who is an avid reader, I left her two books entitled, "How To Be A Bad Cat Toy Nanny And Get Away With It" and "Canine Mind Control". Clooney Claus then returned to Headquarters where the Assembly Line Elves were each given a bonus case of Num-Nums for their hard work, an assortment of fancy mini ales and the entire Elvis CD collection. Pierre Du Port was given a Super Bowl ticket, his favorite poutine flown in from Quebec and a John Wayne DVD Collector Series. And last, but not in any way least, our dear Secretary Neytiri was spoiled by Clooney Claus as this was her very first Christmas. Neytiri was given a robot vacuum (to help with the dusting of Headquarters), her own personal rock climbing wall installed at Headquarters, personal cooking/baking lessons from Martha Stewart, an all expense paid trip to the Natural History Museum in London to visit the Entomology collection, the book "Enjoying Moths" and of course Num-Nums (which goes without saying). And to my Human, Clooney Claus went into his irresistible "stuffed animal" mode where I gave her goo-goo eyes, cuddled her, let her give me a tummy massage and essentially gave her the gift of unconditional love...And guess what I gots in return? I wents to me pantry, took a peek inside and my stock levels of Num-Nums were completely replenished! Isn't that wonderful felines?
And to all felines out there who aren't lucky enough to be spoiled like me, Clooney Claus wishes that you will find safe, loving forever homes full of Num-Nums...

"Clooney Claus" Lost At The North Pole - Uh, Sorry About That!


Personalize funny videos and birthday eCards at JibJab!

December 23, 2010

Mancat Favorite Revealed


 
MANCAT FAVORITE REVEALED...BIKER DUDE ALTER EGO...WINNER OF CONTEST IS COTTON FROM JAN'S FUNNY FARM!!!



Well hello there felines! First of all, I wants to thank those who participated in our contest. We had some excellent responses and it was a very close decision. The official results are in and Neytiri has picked the winner of the Mancat Contest. The winner is the fine lady Cotton from the blog Jan's Funny Farm http://jansfunnyfarm.blogspot.com/. Neytiri decided that Cotton made a great case for her favorite Mancat. Here is what Cotton said:
" But as senior cat here, I get to choose. And I choose Biker Dude. It is just so you! You look so casual and laid back and at ease with who you are. I just want to climb onto the back of your Harley and ride into the sunset with a picnic basket of chicken, ham and tuna juice."

So, I'z going to pick Cotton up and takes her for a ride on the Harley above with my associate "The Baby"(orange Dog Toy with big feet pictured above on the Harley). Cotton, meet us curbside with the picnic basket filled with ham (I loves me ham!). Clooney Claus' surprise for the winner of theese contest is $20 of seed money from my Num-Num Fund to be given to Cotton to start up and grow her very own Num-Num Fund. Cotton, think of it like the kombucha mushroom...I'z giving you the "mother" to grow your very own fund. Now it should be mentioned that theese fund can also be used for things other than Num-Nums. For example, I was once hoping to Adopt A Yak From Tibet with some of my funds. The point is... it is entirely up to Cotton on what to do with her start-up fund. So there you have it folks. Only one more evening till Clooney Claus visits felines and canines delivering pressies. Have the Num-Nums ready, will ya?

December 21, 2010

TUNNEL TUESDAY



TUNNEL TUESDAY: O CHRISTMAS TREE...
Hello there Audience! Ok, because I'z been very jealous of all your beautiful Christmas trees out in theese blogosphere, I decided to makes LOTS of wishes for me own personal Christmas tree. Now I'z mentioned before that theese is my 3rd Christmas with my Human and I'z had NO Christmas trees to date at Headquarters. Theese is simply unacceptable! So I spent a copious amount of zen time in visualization and sending vibes out, wishing for a tree. And guess what? Yah, that's right...my "tunnel" once again came through for me!!! I gets there today and lo and behold, there's my "tree". My tree, I am very proud to say, has birdies on it! In fact, they is red birdies which is particularly festive. Neytiri is very taken with "my" tree...I'z going to share the tree with her because it is her very first Christmas and all and tis the season...(The Assembly Line Elves also like the tree because it is miniature, so I guess I'll be sharing it with them as well...)
"O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree, Much pleasure doth thou bring me!
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree", Thy birdies hang so excellently!
Join me each TUESDAY felines for other magical and mysterious appearances in my "tunnel".
And remember my contest that is open until Wednesday, Dec. 22 at 6 PM PST. On Monday's post below leaves a comment making a case for your favorite "Mancat" aka "alter ego" of mine and ifs you win you gets a surprise from "Clooney Claus". Work it folks, work it...

December 19, 2010

MANCAT MONDAY - "Get Your Mancat On"...

COWBOY CLOON

BOMBS DE LA RENTA

CEO CLOON

JAMES BOMB, AGENT CCC 007

CLOON THE BIKER DUDE
Hello there felines! I'z decided to spice things up a bit and holds a little contest. Above are 5 of my most popular alter egos. Leaves a comment voting for your favorite "Mancat" above and the reason why you'z picked theese particular one. My Secretary Neytiri will be judging theese contest and picking the winner from the comments. The winner will receive a surprise from "Clooney Claus". Please includes your email address in your comments if your email address is not on your bloggie. Theese contest will close at 6 PM PST on Wednesday, December 22, 2010. If you does participate, good lucks to ya!

December 14, 2010

TUNNEL TUESDAY

TUNNEL TUESDAY: COLD HARD CASH

Hello there Audience. I'z laughing all the way to the bank...Theese morning in my tunnel, there appears...CASH. You know... moolah, cashola, dough, bread, bucks, (more specifically) canuck bucks. Theese equals lots of "cloons" ($3 combo of a toon & a loon) that's for sure! Theese amount =YEARS of Humans using the "premises", that's also for sure! I can't believes me eyes! The first thing I'z gonna do is put some of theese cash in my vault. Then, I'z going shopping for Num-Nums...and maybe some STRING toys...hmmm....

Join me each TUESDAY felines for other magical and mysterious appearances in my "tunnel".

(Cloon heads curbside to await his Driver for his shopping expedition...)

December 13, 2010

Psst...Pass The Blog Award On...Will Ya?

Hello Audience, for the past few days I'z been in my Secret Laboratory doing research on my fellow felines who has theese blogs on the interwebs. I'z been charting information, graphing it, applying algorithms etc. etc. and, finally, preparing a report on my findings for the appropriate felines to pass the "one lovely blog award" on to. As I posted a few days ago, my blog was given theese award by Miss Kitty from A Cats Golden Years. Theese blog is just fabulous folks. It has the most beautiful photography and Miss Kitty is a "stunning" subject. Please go have a visit there at: http://www.acatsgoldenyears.blogspot.com/

Felines, do you knows that there is BIZILLIONS (rhymes with VSquillions, a little "inside" joke) of theese felines who has blogs on the interwebs? Isn't theese excellent felines? We'z all in a great position to takes over the interwebs, which of course is great news...My Human & I is just at the tip of the iceberg for discovering theese blogs, reading them and making new friends. Some of theese blogs that we have seen have excellent photography, funny photoshop pictures, heart-warming stories, sad stories, funny and cute stories, funny, cute and mischievous characters, beautiful website/blog design, some are very professional, some more grass-roots, some are newer, some have been in the blogosphere for a while...What they have in common is a love for their felines, other people's felines and felines in general. Just as I said there are theese bizillions of blogs, there should be bizillions of awards given out as well. That being said, I won't give out bizillions because it would take too long and I has Clooneymobiles to produce. So I decided to copy the others and give out 3 Blog Awards. Without further adieu...

CLOON'S TOP 3 BLOGS TO RECEIVE THE "ONE LOVELY BLOG AWARD":

3) "DAISY the CURLY CAT"...(ok, did I surprise anyone out there?) I'm sure theese ones have been given BIZILLIONS of awards, uh...because they deserve it! But they hasn't been given an award from me "George Clooney" yet, so I figures they needs another award. Seriously. Theese blog makes me and my Human smile each time we read it, it is so well-done, we are in awe of it really...and Daisy and Harley, I mean they takes the cake with cuteness. Here is their link: http://daisythecurlycat.blogspot.com/

2) "THE MONKEYS"... Now theese ones probably has MANY MANY awards as well, but everyone could always use another award, don't ya think? Especially from a celebrity... Anyways, we luvs the look of their blog including their blog banner and their daily photographs. We also enjoy their stories. And let's face it... they are all such cute "Floofmeisters". I thinks they collectively takes the category in "floof". Here is their link: http://www.themonkeys.ca/


...AND CLOON'S #1 BLOG TO RECEIVE THE "ONE LOVELY BLOG AWARD" IS...


1) "GOROGORO & NIKONIKO"...Theese ones are a newer blog and I'z sure that they will be receiving Bizillions of awards in the future. Now I'z giving them the award because they looks like me and are my "evil twins". (Kidding! A little Cloon humor for ya there...) I mean I'z not kidding that they looks like me, because they do, but theese is not why I'z giving them the award. Theese ones are getting the award because honestly folks, they'z got it goin' on over there! They'z extremely clever and funny. They takes very cute photos and has cute stories and they knows how to photoshop, (ok...and they looks like me). Here is their link:
http://gorogoronikoniko.blogspot.com/

So there you have it folks, if you don't already frequent theese above blogs, stop by them and say hi, will ya?

Cloon saunters back to his Secret Research Laboratory to file his "findings"...

December 10, 2010

T.G.I.F...Thank God I'm Feline!

T.G.I.F. & T.G.I.F!

Cloon: Hello there Audience. Joining me in-studio today for a T.G.I.F. interview is none other than Secretary Neytiri. I thoughts the Audience might want to learn more about theese little lady...Welcome Neytiri!


Neytiri: Thank you. Thank you very much.


Cloon: Is that a wee bit of an "Elvis" accent I detect?


Neytiri: It most certainly is. I've decided to study acting in my spare time so I'm trying to master as many accents as possible.


Cloon: Excellent! So tell us how you came to have the unique name of Neytiri...


Neytiri: Our Human loved the film Avatar so much that she decided that her next female feline would be named "Neytiri" after the leading character in this film. And I happened to be the next female feline...


Cloon: Uh, but you don't has blue skin or hair...


Neytiri: Uh, but I do have blue eyes...and you said that if I decide to get "blue hair plugs" you can hook me up with someone you know...


Cloon: Very true. "The Baby" has an excellent plastic surgeon in Cabo San Lucas.


Neytiri: Yes, well I'm saving up my pennies just in case I decide to go that route...


Cloon: So tell us, do you have similar characteristics to "Neytiri" in Avatar?


Neytiri: Well you know how that theory goes...when you are named after someone you tend to take on similar characteristics. So, yes. I'm quite fearless just like the character in the movie. For example, I'm not at all scared of vacuum cleaners. In fact, I really like appliances and equipment that make loud noises. I come out to explore whenever something "noisy" is happening. Secondly, I'm a very good climber, I like to climb curtains and carpeted surfaces up as high as I can go. Thirdly, I'm also part of a clan just like the movie character, mine just happens to be the "Ragdoll Clan" and hers is the Na'vi Clan. And finally, my best friend is "Ducky" who happens to be from the bird family just as Neytiri's best friend is a bird-like creature (an Ikran) in the movie.


Cloon: Excellent. For those interested Audience members, we did a previous post on Avatar and a review of the film. http://bit.ly/fVCFb8 Now, tell us about the above photo, what's going on there?


Neytiri: Well, I'm hanging out with my two carrots, which are also favorite toys of mine. One went missing and our Human looked all over the house and could not find it, so the second carrot came out from the "stash". After the fact, she finally found the first one which I had cleverly hidden in the pantry among various spices.


Cloon: Wow, that is very clever! Do you enjoy living at Headquarters?


Neytiri: I do indeed. You know we get really spoiled by our Human and all...And this is my very first Christmas, so I'm excited to see what "Clooney Claus" will bring me!


Cloon: Well there you have it folks... a bit more info about our "little lady".

In addition, something very exciting happened that we wants to share with our Audience...
Miss Kitty from "A Cats Golden Years" gave our blog a special award. You can read more about theese at Miss Kitty's blog: http://bit.ly/ejtzy9 Here is our Award:


We'z very grateful to receive theese award and give our heartfelt thanks to Miss Kitty and her Dad. I'z prepared an Academy Awards acceptance speech, so get your popcorn and sit back felines as theese may take a while...
Just joshin' ya felines! (I'z going to save that for another time...) Even Miss Trovsky from the "Pink Nose Society" wants to takes theese award for herself because it is pink, but I told her that we all has to share it together...So, we're holding a celebration at Headquarters which will involve the Samba and mini mugs of ale to toast our "award"...
In closing I say, "Thank God I'm Feline!"...

December 6, 2010

TUNNEL TUESDAY

TUNNEL TUESDAY: IT'S NUM-NUMS!!! IT'S NUM-NUMS!!!...

(Cloon is SO excited that he is doing a moonwalk around Headquarters)

Hello there Audience. Now theese one is a GOOD one! I goes to my "tunnel" and I can't believe my eyes...There's a whole case of my favorite Num-Nums waiting there for me! Isn't theese spectacular, felines? A long time ago, I did a tutorial on Num-Nums called Num-Nums 101. Here is some key points from my tutorial:

Num-Nums is soft food that smells good and is used to supplement the feline diet of dry crunchies. Sometimes it is given in the morning and at night or just once in the day as a treat. It can come pate style like my favorite one or in chunks with gravy in it. Most felines get quite excited about their Num-Nums and wait in anticipation of the special feeding times. Some do silent meows. Some even get quite crazy. I'm one of theese crazy ones. I run around like a madman in the wee hours of the morn at any hint of tossing and turning from my Human. I've been known to adjust pictures on the wall, knock any apparatus available off shelves or night tables, tug hair from the roots and, of course as a last resort, bite noses just to be given the special stuff. I always need to ensure I have a steady supply of Num-Nums so I takes a regular inventory of the stock in the cupboard. (For a small fee, I can teach any interested felines out there my stock-taking method and system.) I do odd jobs for extra Num-Num money and I own the toilets at Headquarters so any Human must deposit a toon to use the premises. However, in theese hard economic times, I'z raised my prices to a "cloon" which is $3 (a loon & a toon). Uh, sorry about that...

Join me each TUESDAY felines for other magical and mysterious appearances in my "tunnel".