December 25, 2010

Update: Clooney Claus Back On Track - Picked Up By NORAD


MERRY CHRISTMAS! AN UPDATE FROM CLOONEY CLAUS

Hello there felines! Whew! Theese one was a close one...I was stranded on the North Pole in the wee hours of the morn...but luckily one of the felines in theese Cat Blogosphere saved the day (the Christmas Day...that is) by leaving us a comment regarding a GPS. Then I remembered a had theese GPS with me, so I was able to finds my way back to deliver the pressies. So a big thank you to Cody from Cat Chat...Cody, I hopes you received my delivery of extra Num-Nums! So me reindeers tooks me to the United States of America where I headed to Californie to the house of Pip, Smidgen, Minnie, Hollie...and Wriggley. Theese ones has been taking the message of Dear Ol' Clooney Claus to heart and has been preparing for my arrival by having some Num-Nums out and waiting for me...to replenish me energy for my busy night. I thinks theese ones over there eat the same Num-Nums I do...the Wellness Num-Nums, so my gift to them from Clooney Claus was a certificate for unlimited Num-Nums (aka stinky goodness) for the year (I hopes their Human will be ok with that because she does a very good job of keeping theese ones in shape...). And for the canine of theese household...Wriggley, Clooney Claus left a "squirrel" squeaky toy. I'z figured that "squirrels" are usually crowd-pleasers for all canines and I couldn't go wrong with making theese choice. Clooney Claus continued on to see our fine "Empress" Miss Kitty, leaving for her an assortment of treats and Num-Nums and a gift certificate for a spa day where she will be pampered and have a toesies and tummy massage. From there it was on to the east cost where Clooney Claus visited Wally, Ernie, and Zoey, delivering Wally's Christmas list(x3) of nip toys, jingly balls, a heated cat bed, a super duper cat tree, and a Flingamastring. They also were given Num-Nums and a "pet psychology" session for Wally to work out his feelings towards Zoey. Then on to see Gracie, where she was given Num-Nums and treats and (for all her hard work in the cat blogosphere) a one week trip to an all-inclusive resort in Mexico to relax and sun herself, have fancy umbrella drinks and dine at the all you can eat seafood buffet. For my "evil twins", Goro and Niko, I left them Num-Nums and their favorite freeze-dried chicken treats, a "cotton candy" for each of them (aka cotton swab/Q-tip), the book "Photography For Dummies" for Niko and a personal mini-bar for Goro. Then on to see Daisy and Harley where they received Num-Nums and treats and their own private pet lizards complete with aquarium. Then backs to Canada where Clooney Claus visited Annie, Derry and Nicki, leaving them with Num-Nums (aka stinky goodness), tickets to go see a Canadian Wrestling match for Nicki and Derry and for the lady Annie a pile of trashy novels (oops I mean...good literature) to get through theese long, cold Canadian winters...and dark chocolate for their Mom. Then back to Western Canada for one of my favorite canines, my friend & associate Mr. L (aka Private Eye Von Ice), I left him the book "Everything You Want To Know About Squirrels But Were Afraid To Ask", a delectable ham bone, and a ticket & backstage pass to the 2011 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show (Mr. L remember to breathe into the paper bag to avoid hyperventilation). For the feline at Von Ice Enterprises, Miss Stormy who is an avid reader, I left her two books entitled, "How To Be A Bad Cat Toy Nanny And Get Away With It" and "Canine Mind Control". Clooney Claus then returned to Headquarters where the Assembly Line Elves were each given a bonus case of Num-Nums for their hard work, an assortment of fancy mini ales and the entire Elvis CD collection. Pierre Du Port was given a Super Bowl ticket, his favorite poutine flown in from Quebec and a John Wayne DVD Collector Series. And last, but not in any way least, our dear Secretary Neytiri was spoiled by Clooney Claus as this was her very first Christmas. Neytiri was given a robot vacuum (to help with the dusting of Headquarters), her own personal rock climbing wall installed at Headquarters, personal cooking/baking lessons from Martha Stewart, an all expense paid trip to the Natural History Museum in London to visit the Entomology collection, the book "Enjoying Moths" and of course Num-Nums (which goes without saying). And to my Human, Clooney Claus went into his irresistible "stuffed animal" mode where I gave her goo-goo eyes, cuddled her, let her give me a tummy massage and essentially gave her the gift of unconditional love...And guess what I gots in return? I wents to me pantry, took a peek inside and my stock levels of Num-Nums were completely replenished! Isn't that wonderful felines?
And to all felines out there who aren't lucky enough to be spoiled like me, Clooney Claus wishes that you will find safe, loving forever homes full of Num-Nums...

9 comments:

  1. Clooney Claus done real good this year!

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  2. I'm glad you go un-stuck Clooney Claus! I hope your Christmas was purrfect!!!

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  3. Oh Clooney you had me roaring with laughter on this one!!
    Cody is sooo happy that he was reading your blog that day and that he could help you out!
    You were such a busy cat delivering all the nom noms to all of the good kitties!!
    Also...that red outfit is HILARIOUS!!!
    (((((hugs))))

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  4. Shucks! We missed Clooney Claus! Well, maybe Clooney Cupid will come by for Valentines day...

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  5. That was funny! Thanks for the laugh today. I'm so glad to meet you and have added you on my list to follow. Please drop by for a visit anytime.

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  6. Too cute!
    Thanks for participating in Weekend Cat Blogging. The roundup is up now.

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  7. Clooney Claus came through in the end. Good job pal.

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  8. What a night you had. Glad you got unstuck, and what a story to tell. Glad it all worked out and you had a great Christmas.

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  9. Oh Clooney Claus we had no idea that you had problems - because of course mom is behind as usual! Well it sounds like you got out of your trouble and were able to finish your night with ease! We are glad you had such a good night!!

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We love your comments! Psst...can I interest you in a Clooneymobile?