NEWS BULLETIN: MR. L'S BABY SPOTTED IN CABO SAN LUCAS...
Joining me via Skype is an informant friend of mine from the good ol' days. He has just broken this shocking story about "The Baby" on a bender in Mexico.
Cloon: Tell me more. This is just too juicy.
Mr. X: Well Cloon, as you see from the Paparazzi photo, "The Baby" is going for it. He is painting the town orange.
Cloon: Poor Mr. L, he'll be needing an emergency Pet Psychology Session now for sure.
Mr. X: How is he taking the news?
Cloon: He's beside himself. He hasn't ever been separated from "The Baby" before. Not to mention, the reputation of Von Ice Enterprises is at stake as well.
Mr. X: All I can say is here I am at the Cabo Wabo Cantina having a few and suddenly "The Baby" takes the stage for karaoke, singing "One more tequila they were falling in love, one more is never enough"...
Cloon: Good choice of song. I couldn't have done it better myself.
Mr. X: Exactly. He's pulling out all the stops.
Cloon: Does there seem to be an end in sight?
Mr. X: Not at all. Rumor has it, he's just getting started and this may turn into a lifestyle.
Cloon: Shocking, really.
Mr. X: Wait a minute. Here comes "The Baby". He is strutting over in my direction.
Cloon: I want the exclusive interview.
Mr. X: I'll see what I can do, he's a bit temperamental. "Hey 'Baby', Cloon wants a word with you." Ok, Cloon go ahead, I'm handing him the headset.
Cloon: "Baby" what do you have to say for yourself?
"The Baby": Well, try spending your life in a dog's mouth... That's what I'm talkin about...
Cloon: What should I tell Mr. L?
"The Baby": Tell him that absence makes the heart grow fonder and that when I do return, I will have excellent footage for his Mockumentary Filmmaking business. Picture this: DOG TOYS GONE WILD!
Cloon: Now you're talkin...
Mr. X: Adios Amigo, "The Baby" and I are off to do the Macarena...
Cloon: Hey Macarena! Ay! (Audience, Clooney has major paw action going on!)