Clooney's Num-Num Fund

PART III: "THE NEGOTIATOR"

As tensions increase on the picket line, Cloon has no alternative but to call on "The Negotiator".

("The Negotiator" is briefed by Cloon on the picket line regarding the situation with the striking assembly line elves)

Cloon: That's a really nice bow tie you got there.

"T.N": Yo, yo, thanks Dawg!

Cloon: Uh, I'm a feline.

"T.N": Chill, Dawg, it's just an expresshun!

Cloon: Uh, the Yellow Pages said you were a "negotiator", you know like conflict mediator. I was expecting someone a little more professional.

"T.N": You got somethin' against rap, Dawg?

Cloon: Whatcha talkin 'bout Willis?

"T.N": Didn't cha read the fine print? I'm a "negotiator" that settles disputes through the art of "rap".

Cloon: I left my ESPN reading glasses up at Headquarters, I must have missed that part. Can you give me a sample performance?

"T.N": Sure, I'll perform a rap song by my mentor "Weird Al Yankovic":

"Baby, you should know

I am really quite a sweet guy,

When I buy you bathroom tissue,

I always get the 2-ply.

Want it, you can get it,

my dear,

I got my Costco membership card right here.

Cut your hair with scissors

and a soup bowl,

You ain't gotta pay me,

that's the way that I roll."

(Audience, "The Negotiator" has some pretty "stiff" moves to go with his rap song)

Cloon: Impressive! Can you compose a rap song about num-nums?

"T.N": Another time Dawg. I need to interview "Private Eye" Von Ice, the Babushka Cat Hot Dog Vendor, and finally all the striking Assembly Line Elves each separately to get all sides of the story.

Yo, but first I need to use the "premises"... must be that hot dawg...

YO, YO...BE SURE TO TUNE IN TOMORROW FOR THE EXCITING AND SURPRISING CONCLUSION!