CLOON EMERGES FROM CHAMBER... TRIUMPHANT! FELINE WORLD RECORD BROKEN!
Headquarters is brimming with excitement as Cloon jumps out of the "Donut" and heads into the kitchen for num-nums. The National Feline Enquirer is on hand for the exclusive interview with Cloon (once he replenishes his strength with num-nums).
Cloon now yawns, stretches and then sambas onto the stage to face his faithful fans.
NFE: Congratulations to you George Clooney for breaking the feline world record for holding a yoga pose while staying inside a kitty condo!
Cloon: It was a most difficult feat, but I was the right feline for the job.
NFE: How did you manage to stay in the chamber for 24 hours?
Cloon: I went into a meditative state and counted cans of num-nums.
NFE: Wow, that's incredible. How many were you able to count in 24 hours?
Cloon: Exactly 86,400 cans.
NFE: At any point, were you tempted to forfeit the record attempt and leave the chamber?
Cloon: There was major birdie action today, lots of chirping going on around me. Usually, I'm glued to the windows on "birdie patrol". But instead of leaving the "Donut", I persisted and went back to counting num-nums.
NFE: Well, this is quite a story. You are a very talented and disciplined feline. What are your plans for the evening?
Cloon: My feline friend here at Headquarters is going to give me a massage with her little paws and work out all the kinks from the yoga pose and then I'm going to watch the Season Finale of "The Bachelor". The interwebs had all kinds of juicy rumors about the outcome.
NFE: Thanks for the exclusive, Cloon!
Cloon: Get the popcorn ready, here I come for "The Bachelor"...